Sorry I haven't posted in a very long time. I have started a new job and switched to working afternoon/evening shifts & I always lose track of time. I always think of writing a post, but by time I'm about to get around to it I've run out of time.
So in the time that's passed I've started a new job, which is with the company I wrote the blog post about. Super excited I was offered the position when my interview was less than 100% because of Crohn's. I have received additional insurance support through my hospital for the last year & that ended the 1st of July. I had forgot it ended until July 5, and that meant I had to postpone my last infusion date originally scheduled for the 11th of July. I resubmitted my paperwork to be covered this year & although I am waiting for approval I made less money last year than the previous year so I am thinking I will receive 100% coverage like I had before.
I was going to wait to receive an infusion until I was positive I was covered but my body won't allow me to wait that long. I find it difficult to understand my body and come to terms with the fact that my case of Crohn's is so moderate to severe that Pentasa alone even after surgery is not enough. So here I am once again sitting in the infusion room praying that I don't get sick tonight since I have to work 3:30-11:30pm.
I knew I had worn out my Remicade when I started having issues with holding it. I got to a point where when I needed the bathroom, I NEEDED THE BATHROOM! Walking stead fast through a mall is not the easiest thing to do when you got to go. Let alone having to turn around & walk the same route again because you still have to go. No shame from this girl in using a public toilet...mostly because I have no other choice so mine as well OWN IT! Then the mouth sores returned & I am currently sporting 2 of them. I'm overjoyed about them, note the super sarcasm in above comment. The thing I still can not deal with is the accidents of any degree. I had one this morning and I was so embarrassed for no reason. No one was home & being in the comfort of my home I could take care of myself & had all the clothes in the world. But still the feeling of disbelief, embarrassment, and sadness washed over me. I can fully admit that I don't understand enough of my disease to comprehend the losing of the bowels, but it doesn't mean it doesn't happen. So I'm sitting here being pumped full of Remicade hoping that in 24 hours my body will start to return to remission, and I can return to minor worry about my Crohn's. I highly doubt I will ever become ok with this aspect of my Crohn's. So then there isn't much else to do but move on, no use crying over spilt milk. I hope everyone has a glorious week & can you believe it's almost August!?!
Take Care
